Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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