names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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