i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
