Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
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