Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
