He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Fuck appropriateness.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
