Man, jail baloney is awful.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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