You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
