why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
