Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he shaved USA in his pubs
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
