there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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