He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
