Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
