Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I just had sex on a roof
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
