Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
