That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
