i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize