first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize