I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
