saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I puked a lego.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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