talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I FOUND THE LEGS
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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