i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
