what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
