God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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