Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
