so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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