I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
