Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
