belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
