Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
