sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
