I hope mine doesn't look like that
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
