Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
