i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
