If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
