is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize
