We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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