if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I wish they made helmets for livers.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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