better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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