i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
