If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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