i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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