Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize