...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
