Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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