I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
