Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
