I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
as a side note pls kill me
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
