new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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