Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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